I have reached home.
Today I took the steps leading me to the future, the place I want to be. I sit here revelling in the feeling of achievement I so rarely get to enjoy and…I am in awe.
Sometimes wishing is not enough. Sometimes, settling only gets you so far. But I have to ask myself why, on this journey here, did I question the fundamental right of anyone to pursue more than what their goal is? I ridiculed the idea that pushing further would reap rewards of happiness and success equally. I postured the idealism that greed is the main source of pursuit, leading down a slippery slope to materialism and superficial lifestyles. I know it is.
But here I sit. The hunger is dated. I have reached the point where I want to be and that gurgling murmur of delight escaping my lips is not one of greed or want; it’s the sound of knowing that taking the risk to reach my happiness was not complete madness.
My happy place: a wet log covered by a doggy sack to keep my posterior dry whilst I type this drivel.
My view – exquisite! A soft clearing half way up a hill overlooking the valley of wild grass and heather below. The sound of crunching leaves behind me as Henry pursues the heady scents of foxes and birds in his happy state. I can’t say everything here is perfect. As I crossed the gulley surrounded by gorse bushes, I honestly thought I wouldn’t make it. But I did. And once in the clearing under the tall redwoods, my celebrations were greeted by a dead bird lying on the damp grass. Not to be dissuaded, I moved further away after praying for its little soul. Yes, if we have souls, so do the beasts that co-habit this earth. There, I found my log, riddled with woodworm and all things unpleasant. This is where I sit, content.
Sometimes, pushing for those dreams is definitely worth it.